Writing your own obituary may seem strange, but it can be a meaningful process. To write your obituary, start by finding inspiration from published obituaries. Include basic information like your name, birth date, and hometown. Mention important life events, family members, interests, and values. Finally, provide funeral details and end with a heartfelt message to leave a lasting impression. Let’s talk about these in more detail.
Steps to Write Your Own Obituaries
Here are the steps you should take:
Step 1: Find Inspiration for Your Obituary
It can be helpful to seek some inspiration as you start this process. To find inspiration for writing your obituary:
- Explore Published Obituaries: Read local newspapers and notable publications for common structures and tones.
- Search Online Sources: Review websites and archives presenting various styles of obituaries.
- Check Social Media: Search for obituaries posted by families for recent examples.
- Review Notable Features: Review notable obituary series, such as The New York Times' Overlooked.
Step 2: Start with Basic Information
The second step of your obituary must contain the fundamental information regarding your life. Such information makes other people familiar with you and makes it accurate. Provide the following information:
- Your complete name (with any nicknames or maiden names.)
- Your birth date and place.
- Your death date and place (you may choose to leave this blank, and that's okay)
- Your age at the time of passing (this can be filled in later)
- The town or city you lived in.
For example:
John Michael Doe, known as "Johnny" to his friends, was born in Chicago, Illinois, on March 12, 1950. He lived a full life and passed away peacefully in his home at 75.
Step 3: Highlight Important Life Events
After covering the basics, write about the major milestones in your life. These can include:
- Education (schools attended, degrees earned)
- Career (job titles, companies worked for, achievements)
- Military service (if applicable)
- Personal achievements (awards, recognitions, or contributions to the community)
- Keep it brief but meaningful.
For example:
John graduated from the University of Illinois with a business degree and dedicated 40 years to banking, earning the trust of his clients
Step 4: Include Family Information
Mentioning your family members is an important part of an obituary. You can include:
- Parents' names.
- Spouse’s name (if applicable.)
- Children's names.
- Grandchildren, siblings, or other important family members.
For example:
John is survived by his loving wife, Mary, his children, David and Emily, and his three grandchildren. He was preceded in death by his parents, Robert and Susan Doe.
Step 5: Share Personal Interests and Hobbies
An obituary should reflect who you are beyond your work and family life. Think about what made you unique and how you spent your time. This can include:
- Hobbies (gardening, fishing, painting, etc.)
- Volunteer work.
- Special talents.
- Passions and interests.
For example:
John had a passion for woodworking and spent countless hours crafting beautiful furniture for his family in his workshop. He was also an avid fisherman who loved taking his grandchildren on fishing trips.
Step 6: Express Your Values and Beliefs
You may want to say a few words regarding what you used to believe in and the values you cherished. This could include:
- Religious or spiritual beliefs.
- Philosophy of life.
- Most treasured quotes.
- Advice you would like to pass on.
For instance:
John believed in being kind, working hard, and always helping others. He always said, "A good life is determined by the love you share, not the money you make."
Step 7: Provide Funeral or Memorial Information
If you would like, you can leave information about your funeral or memorial service. This may include:
- Date, time, and place of services.
- Special requests (charitable gifts instead of flowers, etc.)
For example:
John’s life will be celebrated on Saturday, March 15, at 2:00 PM at St. Mary’s Church in Chicago. Instead of flowers, donations may be made to the American Cancer Society.
Step 8: Conclude with a Thoughtful Closing
End your obituary with a final message. This could be:
- A farewell message.
- A note of gratitude to loved ones.
- A final reflection.
For example:
John’s kindness, humor, and love for his family will be dearly missed, but his spirit will live on in the hearts of those who knew him.
Why Should I Write My Own Obituary?
Writing your obituary offers several benefits:
- Makes it Accurate: You get to include correct information about yourself rather than relying on assumptions.
- Capture Personal Voice: Writing it for yourself maintains your tone and personality.
- Lightens Load on Family Members: Pre-writing relieves stress for relatives at a vulnerable moment.
- Inspirations for Life Review: The process stimulates reflection, assisting you in examining your life course.
- Clarifies Last Wishes: You can provide guidance on memorialization or giving to charity.
Taking the initiative ensures your history is presented naturally and with forethought.
Conclusion
Writing your own obituary can be a meaningful experience. It allows you to share accurate details about your life and reflect on what matters most to you. By expressing your voice and values, you help your family during a difficult time. You can also clarify your final wishes, ensuring your story is remembered just as you want it. This thoughtful process of writing Oklahoma obituaries honors your journey and legacy.